Things You'd Never Hear On Charmed
by Dr. Maybe
Summary: Things the charmed ones and co. would never say.rated for mild language and suggestion


Andy Trudeau: Oh, a demon is gonna kill Prue? That's cool, I'll just sit back and watch.

Andy: Prue, I love you and everything but I'm gonna have to turn you in for murder...I'm pretty sure you're just making up this demon/ witch thing.

Andy: Don't you just love that antique old clock?

Andy: Prue must be in the wrong place and the wrong time a lot for her name to show up in so many unsolved cases. I don't think she had anything to do with them.

Angel of Death: I will mind my own business and do my job.

Billie: I think I need to study more.

Billie: Christy's dead(yawns). thank god.

Billie: Okay, we have to be cautious and careful. And smart. Let's not rush into anything, without really knowing what we're doing.

Billie: I never really liked Christy to begin with. She was a even when we were little

Chris: Hmm, what was that, Wyatt? You're going to turn evil and kill us all? Okay, fine by me. I'm not gonna try and stop you.

Chris: Oh, sure what do you want to know about the future?

Chris: Oh, Wyatt, you're evil again? Thats cool.

Chris: WHY DO NONE OF THESE PEOPLE UNDERSTAND SARCASM?!

Chris: Oh sure, I mean, I totally love Leo. He's the most attentive being I've ever met.

Christy: You know what, the Charmed Ones are entitled to be a little selfish after all they've been through. Let's just leave them alone and let them be happy

Christy: Billie you were right about the sisters, they are good after all and I want to join you all and fight evil

Cole: if i was Coop i would buy some whore-repelant

Cole: Phoebe, it's over between us. I don't love you anymore. You have to move on.

Dan: Yeah, Piper, so you're breaking up with me because you really love Leo? That's okay. I totally understand. I'm so happy for you.

Darryl: A door closing by itself sure cracks me up.

Darryl: OMG, are you doing a spell? Magic is so amazing! Can I watch? Will you teach me about magic?

Darryl: I know demons are always attacking your house but I really need someone to watch my kids

Elise: "What was I thinking when I hired her for the job!?"

Grams: Lets get jiggy with it!

Grams: So, Prue, Piper, Phoebe? Remember what I taught you? The most important thing to do in your life is get married and settle down. Find love, be a good, obedient wife, it's the best thing you can do. What would we do without our men?

Grams: Stop disturbing me you silly witches. I have my own death to live.

Henry: I am a VERY, VERY interesting person...WHY ARE YOU ALL YAWNING????

Inspector Sheridan: Who cares what the Halliwells secret is? It's none of my business, anyway!

Jason Dean: Phoebe, you're a witch? How awesome!

Jason: "Finally she gave me a way out of that relationship! Sex is all what she thinks about !"

Jenny Gordon: I don't miss my parents at all. I enjoy the freedom of not always having them bugging me.

Kyle Brody: What do you want to talk about, Paige? Anything but Avatars, okay? Anything but Avatars

Leo -i could have healed Prue but she was always a bit whiney, you know?

Leo:Thanks for helping to make me an elder, Chris! I was so sick of baby sitting those girls all the time.

Leo: I saved Piper because Prue was already dead and I couldn't heal her. Whatever.

Leo: I should have married Prue

Leo: Piper go ahead and scream your head because i am always wrong

Leo: Ok Piper, now that I've became all hunky again, I think I want an open marriage. I've always had a thing for that big afro-destiny chick, so I'll go now. Ba-Bye.

Leo: Paige, I'm leaving Piper, wanna orb to Mexico with me for a romantic getaway?

Leo: Whitelighter pay is really good.

Leo: Your powers don't come from your emotions. Just because you're the charmed ones doesn't make you special.

Leslie: Phoebe REALLY likes me. Honestly. NO, I am NOT a boyfriend-of-the-week...

Paige - Do you know who i liked? Cole. There was a guy you could trust!

Paige - HAHA phoebe has a crappy power!

Paige: I won't ever be as good a witch as Prue was, but you know what? That's okay. I'm my own person.

Paige: lets not use magic today

Paige-let's give up magic it is getting boring don't you think Phoebe?

Paige:you should be more responsible.

Paige: So what Richard is consumed by magic at least i dont have to hide my secret

Patty: I hate you all! I wish I had never had children! Why are you all such frickin screw-ups?

Pheobe: Hey can we bring back cole? just for one night!

Phoebe: You know come to think about it I never wanted kids to begin with

Phoebe: Damn I have an active power. Just as I quit wanting one too.

Phoebe: I don't think I'm ready to have kids! Am I mature enough to be a mother?

Phoebe: I have GOT to get to K-Mart and pick up some new clothes.

Phoebe: I think i'll wear a frumpy outfit that shows off absolutely no skin espicially no cleavage.

Phoebe: I will become a nun.

Phoebe: I've lost my libido, did you guys see it anywhere?

Phoebe: Now, Chris, don't feel bad that Wyatt is about a million times smarter and more powerful than you. We can't all be as wonderful as Wyatt is!

Phoebe: That's it! I'm giving up on men!

Phoebe: I've just realized that I shouldn't put my unborn child before saving innocents. It's just selfish

Phoebe: I just bought this gorgeous paper bag to wear for my date tonight, my boyfriend's gonna love it!

Piper: Man, my sisters are total whores!

Piper: Uh... Prue? What the hell's up with your eyes!!!???

Piper: What does it matter if i get back with Leo, I'm just going to lose him again anyway

Piper: Can I borrow something from your wardrobe, Pheebs?

Piper: "The Power of Three will-- oh screw it who gives a crap!"

Piper: don't bother cleaning up I don't mind if the house is messy

Piper: I'm been the middle sister for my whole life. Now being the eldest, why can't Prue pick a better job.

Darryl: I know demons are always attacking your house but I really need someone to watch my kids

Piper: Mmm hmm, so the Elders don't think I should be with Leo? No biggie, I'll just go back to Dan or Greg.

Piper: Phoebe and Paige. How dare you insult the Elders, they are just doing their job and I think that they do it well. What would we do without them

Piper: The hell with Leo, i'm going to a strip club.

Piper: Who needs a normal life. I have TV and a stash of pigs feet and frog tounge in the kitchen.

Piper: Yeah, he's just a little neurotic...

Prue - I swapped the Book of Shadows for some magic beans...

Prue: Hey piper why don't you take lead I'll just sit back and watch

Prue: Screw personal gain! I want new clothes!

Prue: So kitty was the one who hid my Prozac!!

PRUE: Why the hell am I dead and those idiots are still running around out there?

Prue: You know what, Piper, Phoebe, just do whatever you want. I really don't give a damn.

Richard: I am SO beyond the whole feud thing. All that bad karma, the best thing to do is just not do magic. And that is totally fine with me. It'll be a refreshing change.

Sam: Patty's death was meant to be. It was her time, and it was not my fault in any way

Sheila: Oh, Darryl, so you're blowing off your date with me to go help the Halliwell sisters hunt demons? And you

Victor: I love whitelighters! Especially Sam, he's like my best friend! So nice! might get killed? Okay, have fun!


End file.
